Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Dis-Ease

CCD - not Cathode Coupled Device.. thats in digicams... not Cafe Coffee Day.. thats where you're supposed to get coffee... This CCDis Compulsive Capitalization Disorder a latest anomaly found in the working population of the world

Symptoms:
Pain in the smallest finger, aka pinky... not "Pinky aunty" due to constant impact against the left shift key. This anomaly is also observed in the right Pinky of certain Human ANOMALIES.
Any literature typed by such affected individuals is characterized by regular or Irregular (however you may want to view it) appearance of capitalized alphabets.

Self Diagnosis:
Type this paragraph a couple of times on your PC. If it looks exactly like this then you might be normal or you might have some "visual defects".. anyways those ailments are not subject of this paper.. might deal with them some other time.

Scenario 2
Type This Paragraph A Couple Of Times On Your Pc. If It Looks Like This Then You Are In The Initial Stages Of This Disorder. Take some time out, go out with your friends, meet them in person rather than on IM and behold you are normal again.

Scenario 3
TyPe ThIs PaRaGrApH A CoUpLe Of TiMeS On YoUr Pc. If It LoOkS LiKe ThIs ThEn YoU ArE ReAcHiNg ThE PeAk Of AfFlIcTiOn. YoU HaVe LoSt CoNtRoL OvEr YoUr BeLoVeD PiNkY. Tie that pinky someplace safe and you should be good to go.

Scenario 4
TYPE THIS PARAGRAPH A COUPLE OF TIMES ON YOUR PC. IF IT LOOKS LIKE THIS THEN YOU HAVE REACHED THE FINAL STAGE OF THIS DISEASE. YOUR PINKY IS IN LOCKDOWN. GIVE UP ALL MOH-MAYA AND TAKE SANYAAS.

Scenario 5
T y p e t h I s p a r a g r a p h a c o u p l e o f t I m e s o n y o u r p c . I f I t l o o k s l I k e t h I s t h e n y o u r C C D h a s s p r e a d a n d I n f e c t e d y o u r r I g h t t h u m b a s w e l l . Refer to scenario 3 for more details.

Scenario 6
Sadgfasgdfaefvscrafsdgsacdfsadsdchgsdchsgbd. Hey you are sleeping on the left side of your keyboard. Stop reading these blogs in the middle of the night. They are for your reference during work hours only.


BTW How's Pinky Aunty?? ;)

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

I.T. Man's love song

Look what you're doing to me
I'm utterly at your whim
All of my defenses down
Your camera looks through me
With its X-ray vision
And all systems run aground
All I can manage to push from my lips
Is a stream of absurdities
Every word I intended to speak
Wind up locked in the circuitry

No way to control it
It's totally automatic
Whenever you're around
I'm walking blindfolded
Completely automatic
All of my systems are down
Down down down
Automatic
Automatic

What is this madness
That makes my motor run
And my legs too weak to stand
I go from sadness
To exhilaration
Like a robot at your command
My hands perspire and shake like a leaf
Up and down goes my temperature
I summon doctors to get some relief
But they tell me there is no cure
They tell me

No way to control it
It's totally automatic
Whenever you're around
I'm walking blindfolded
Completely automatic
All of my systems are down
Down down down
Automatic
Automatic

N.B. This song belongs to "The Pointer Sisters"

Monday, October 6, 2008

Revolutionary Politics

Ever wondered what we could do to prevent the country's politics from going to the dogs. Roshesh Sarabhai from Sarabhai vs Sarabhai briefly touches upon a groundbreaking, revolutionary, fantastic etc. etc. solution.

lagul lagul lagul lagul
laal laal lagul lagul JELLY
jelly ke cabre dancer jaise shareer mein chhupi hai
anjaani ankahee paheli
jelly hai moma ka mann
narm mulayam meetha
pasand hai ise har koi
sangeeta rita mita aneeta
jelly giri zameen par
to awaaz aayi PLUP PLUP!
baccha usme haath maare
to sunai deti hai THUP THUP!
jelly par kabhi fungus na lage
uska swaad kabhi bhankas na lage
agar bachani hai hume hamari country...

TOH JELLY KO BANANA HOGA HAMARA PRADHAN MANTRI!!
Any takers for that???