Saturday, January 8, 2011

Are you a Hindi? What's a Bindi?

An interesting forward I came across about "Firang" perception bout India...

Are all Indians vegetarian?
Yes. Even tigers are vegetarian in India.

Does India have cars?
No. We ride elephants to work. The government is trying to encourage ride-sharing schemes.

What does that red dot on women's forehead mean?
Well, in ancient times, Indian men used to practice archery skills by target practicing by aiming at their wife's red dot. In fact, that is one of the reasons why they had many wives. You see, once they mastered the art of archery and hit the target....

Does India have TV?
No. We only have cable.

Are you a Hindi?
Yes. I am spoken everyday in Northern India.

Do you speak Hindu?
Yes, I also speak Jewish, Islam and Christianity.

Is it true that everyone there is very corrupt?
Yes, in fact, I had to bribe my parents so that they would let me go to school.

India is very hot, isn't it?
It is so hot there that all the water boils spontaneously. That is why tea is such a popular drink in India.

Indians cannot eat beef, huh?
Cows provide milk which is a very essential part of Indian diet. So eating cows is forbidden. However in order to decrease the population of the country, the government is trying to encourage everyone to eat human meat.

Why do you sometimes wear Indian clothes to work?
I prefer it to coming naked.

LOL!!

11 comments:

Ankita said...

hii

hahah! very interesting and crisp answers!

:)

Monica Dhiman said...

hey thr ..gud one :)

Shrikant said...

Thanks A S
Thanks Monica

Really funny those answers.. couldn't help post such a hilarious forward

Magali Vaz said...

This made me laugh & yet made me a little angry. When we go to foreign countries for vacations, locals there are shocked that we speak English fluently. But can we blame them, when you look at a lot of the India population living in other countries.

Shrikant said...

@Magali Yeah tru.. a lot of foreign nationals have some kinda wrong impression bout Indians.. but that cuz of the Indians that they encounter and also to some extent cuz of ignorance about things happening in the sub continent!!

Rajlakshmi said...

OMG ROFL ROFL... crazy anaswers :D absolutely hillarious :D

Unknown said...

some things will never change... :))))

Shrikant said...

@Rajlakshmi... yeah.. absolutely hilarious

@Prachie.. yeah.. some attitudes never change!!

Hemal Shah said...

Shri, this list is long dude.. i guess.. i remember reading this long ago and it had landed up in my pervious offiz ka inbox.. so there is no way i cant trace that now.. but hey, you got the title superbly :)

Hemal Shah said...

here it is... i guess you omitted some willingly.. did you?


Q. What does that red dot on women's forehead mean?
A. Well, in ancient times, Indian men used to practice archery skills by target practicing by aiming at their wife's red dot. In fact, that is one of the reasons why they had many wives. You see, once they mastered the art of archery and hit the target....
Q. You're from India? I have read so much about the country. All the wonderful places, the forests, the snake charmers, the elephants. Do you still use elephants for transportation?
A. Absolutely. In fact we used to have our own elephant in our house. But later, we started participating in elephant-ride sharing schemes with our neighbors, to save the air. You see elephants have an "emissions" problem.....
Q. Does India have cars?
A. No. We ride elephants to work. The government is trying to encourage ride-sharing schemes.
Q. Does India have TV?
A. No. We only have cable.
Q. Are all Indians vegetarian?
A. Yes. Even tigers are vegetarian in India.
Q. How come you speak English so well?
A. You see when the British were ruling India, they employed Indians as servants. It took too long for the Indians to learn English. So the British isolated an "English-language" gene and infused their servants' babies with it and since then all babies born are born speaking English.
Q. Are you a Hindi?
A. Yes. I am spoken everyday in Northern India.
Q. Do you speak Hindu?
A. Yes, I also speak Jewish, Islam and Christianity.
Q. Is it true that everyone there is very corrupt?
A. Yes, in fact, I had to bribe my parents so that they would let me go to school.
Q. India is very hot, isn't it?
A. It is so hot there that all the water boils spontaneously. That is why tea is such a popular drink in India.
Q. Are there any business companies in India?
A. No. All Indians live on the Gandhian principles of self-sufficiency. We all make our own clothes and grow our own food. That is why you see all these thin skinny Indians -- it is is a lot of hard work.
Q. Indians cannot beef, huh?
A. Cows provide milk which is a very essential part of Indian diet. So eating cows is forbidden. However in order to decrease the population of the country, the government is trying to encourage everyone to eat human meat.
Q. India is such a religious place. Do you meditate regularly?
A. Yes, sometimes I meditate for weeks without food and drink. But it is difficult to keep my job, because I have to miss work when I meditate like that. But the bosses there do the same thing. That is why things are so inefficient there.
Q. I saw on TV that people there walk on burning coals. Why do they do that?
A. We don't have shoes. So we burn the bottom of our feet to make it hard so that we can walk.
Q. Why do you sometimes wear Indian clothes to work?
A. I prefer it to coming naked.

Shrikant said...

@Hemal.. thanks for sharing the entire forward.. An excellent one surely!! And thanks again for liking the title